What to do if you are ghosted. First off, what does being ghosted mean? It means someone who you wee significantly intimate with (sexual or love based intimacy) simply disappears or tells you to get out their life and never speaks to you again. It’s a common occurrence in today’s fast paced, ‘I can get another date tomorrow’ society. Essentially it’s adults acting like children because they are in their own trauma and don’t have the courage to meet in person or pick up the phone and talk it out.

You can see how ridiculous it is when this BBC article wrote about a company set up in UK who you can pay to get them to split up with your partner for you. What in the heck has the world come to? I could understand this for 14 year olds but for grown adults? Wtf.

So here is what you need to do…

What To Do If You Are Ghosted

1. Realise it is not about you. 

At the moment you might be feeling like a victim of your story.

2. Rage at a pillow. Not them.

You probably feel the urge to contact them and rage at them for ‘doing this to you’. F that. Get a pillow and start screaming at that (pretending it is them). There is no need to waste time and energy sending them a voicemail or another text message.

3. Once you are done raging. Love them. 

You now know it was not about you. You are not the victim. Now you can choose to love them. Send them love with your thoughts and heart. You don’t need to tell them or call them. Just be thankful for the good times (and bad times) that you had. They were all a learning curve for you for the next part of your journey.

4. Remember that you are not alone. Reach out for help. 

If you are still feeling hard done by please go and speak to a friend, or get some bodywork done by a good therapist, and process whatever emotions that need to be processed.

5. Give yourself time, love, and patience

Turn the self love and self acceptance volume up louder. Do everything you can to realise the value of your own being and just because one person ran away from the situation does not make you any less valuable.

6. Remember. Nothing Is What It Seems. 

This seems bad right now but this could well be the best thing that ever happened to you. Do you remember another similar time when a so-called “bad” thing was happening in your life and then what happened next? You found joy again. Remember everything is happening FOR YOU in your life, not against you. Your next love is just waiting for you around the corner. When one door shuts, another million open.

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Raw Attraction is the leading magazine for men and women about love and sexuality. Founded in 2012, we aim to bring you life changing articles, podcasts, and videos about love and sex.

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  • Law Dawg

    Ghosted is a great term for this, and I have had it happen to me in the past. It can be incredibly painful when it happens because there is no closure. One minute you are in a relationship, and the next minute you are not. It can be difficult to move on after.

    • yes being ghosted is not nice but you have to just remember that the universe is working for you and not against you